“Like a rainbow with all of the colours.Taylor Swift
So, I’m sitting here wondering how to start this post, I’m a bit of a jumble of emotions at the moment. It’s one of those (all too regular) times where I honestly don’t know whether I want to laugh or cry.
Does anyone else feel like that sometimes? Where it feels like your emotions are racing so far ahead of your conscious mind, and you kind of have to wait for your mind to catch up with your heart so that you can figure out what it is that you’re actually feeling?
That’s one of the reasons why I decided to start an art journal; if I can’t work through my feelings then I grab my journal and whatever supplies I am drawn towards and I just start funnelling that emotion onto the page. Sometimes I start and after a while I realise that I don’t feel like that anymore so I change directions, others I subconsciously create something that tells me what it is that is making me feel that way.
I find it so cathartic, but in a safe way; it’s my way of understanding and relieving those inner battles. A coping mechanism that I’ve developed to avoid older, more harmful, paths that I spent time on in the past.
I made a promise to myself that I won’t remove a page from my journal, no matter how I feel about it, how dark or ugly it is. That’s what I was thinking about when I opened my journal this week.
Life is the good and the bad. It is a rainbow of all the colours, they won’t all be your favourite but one thing is certain; you can’t have any of them without having ALL OF THEM.
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